diff options
Diffstat (limited to 'fortune-mod/.local/share/fortune/kernelcookies')
| -rw-r--r-- | fortune-mod/.local/share/fortune/kernelcookies | 581 |
1 files changed, 581 insertions, 0 deletions
diff --git a/fortune-mod/.local/share/fortune/kernelcookies b/fortune-mod/.local/share/fortune/kernelcookies new file mode 100644 index 0000000..3dcb616 --- /dev/null +++ b/fortune-mod/.local/share/fortune/kernelcookies @@ -0,0 +1,581 @@ +/* Only Sun can take such nice parts and fuck up the programming interface + * like this. Good job guys... + */ + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/sunhme.c +% +/* This card is _fucking_ hot... */ + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/sunhme.c +% +If you don't see why, please stay the fuck away from my code. + Rusty, in linux-2.6.6/Documentation/DocBook/kernel-locking.tmpl +% +/* Fuck, we are miserable poor guys... */ + linux-2.6.6/net/xfrm/xfrm_algo.c +% +/* Ugly, ugly fucker. */ + linux-2.6.6/include/linux/netfilter_ipv4/ipt_limit.h +% +/* XXX: where the fuck is ->f_vfsmnt? */ + linux-2.6.6/fs/intermezzo/vfs.c +% + if(ct<0) + ct=2; /* Shit happens.. */ + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/wan/z85230.c +% +/* Remember: "Different name, same old buggy as shit hardware." */ + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/sunhme.c +% +/* This is total bullshit: */ + linux-2.6.6/drivers/video/sis/init301.c +% +/* The HME is the biggest piece of shit I have ever seen. */ + linux-2.6.6/drivers/scsi/esp.h +% +/* Sun, you just can't beat me, you just can't. Stop trying, + * give up. I'm serious, I am going to kick the living shit + * out of you, game over, lights out. + */ + linux-2.6.6/arch/sparc/lib/checksum.S +% +printk("WE HAVE A BUG HERE!!! stk=0x%p\n", stk); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/block/cciss_scsi.c +% +printk("%s: huh ? Who issued this format command ?\n") + linux-2.6.6/drivers/block/ps2esdi.c +% +printk("whoops, seeking 0\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/block/swim3.c +% +printk("GSCD: magic ...\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/cdrom/gscd.c +% +printk(" (Read error)"); /* Bitch about the problem. */ + linux-2.6.6/drivers/cdrom/mcd.c +% +printk(" Speed now 1x"); /* Pull my finger! */ + linux-2.6.6/drivers/cdrom/mcd.c +% +printk("%s: confused, missing data\n", drive->name); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/ide/ide-cd.c +% +printk(KERN_ERR "ide: huh? queue was plugged!\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/ide/ide-io.c: +% +printk ("%s: This looks like a LART board to me.\n",module_name); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/mtd/devices/lart.c +% +panic("Damn it Jim! I'm a doctor, not a programmer! " + "Oh, wait a sec, I am a programmer. " + "And, who's Jim?!?!\n" + "Arrgghh! We've done it again!\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/message/fusion/mptlan.c +% +/* panic?? These should never occur in our application. */ + linux-2.6.6/drivers/scsi/aic7xxx/aiclib.c +% +panic("This never returns"); + linux-2.6.6/kernel/power/swsusp.c +% +panic("do_trap: can't hit this"); + linux-2.6.6/arch/i386/mm/extable.c +% +panic("Alas, I survived.\n"); + linux-2.6.6/arch/ppc64/kernel/rtas.c +% +tracer_panic("I'm tracing myself and I can't get out"); + linux-2.6.6/arch/um/kernel/tt/syscall_user.c +% +panic("Halt failed!"); + linux-2.6.6/arch/sparc/kernel/process.c +% +panic("smp_callin() AAAAaaaaahhhh....\n"); + linux-2.6.6/arch/parisc/kernel/smp.c +% +panic("If this is a 64-bit machine, please try a 64-bit kernel.\n"); + linux-2.6.6/arch/parisc/kernel/inventory.c +% +panic("Yeee, unsupported cache architecture."); + linux-2.6.6/arch/mips/mm/cache.c +% +panic("\n"); + linux-2.6.6/arch/mips/tx4927/common/tx4927_irq.c +% +panic("%s called. This Does Not Happen (TM).", __FUNCTION__); + linux-2.6.6/arch/mips/mm-64/tlb-dbg-r4k.c +% +panic("No information about myself?"); + linux-2.6.6/arch/mips/sgi-ip27/ip27-timer.c +% +panic("%s: CORRUPTED BTREE OR SOMETHING", __FUNCTION__); + linux-2.6.6/fs/xfs/xfs_bmap.c +% +printk (KERN_ERR "%s: Oops - your private data area is hosed!\n", ...) + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/ewrk3.c +% +rio_dprintk (RIO_DEBUG_ROUTE, "LIES! DAMN LIES! %d LIES!\n",Lies); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/char/rio/rioroute.c +% +printk("NONONONOO!!!!\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/atm/zatm.c +% +printk("@#*$!!!! (%08x)\n", ...) + linux-2.6.6/drivers/atm/zatm.c +% +fs_dprintk (FS_DEBUG_IRQ, "Iiiin-coming (0)!!!!\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/atm/firestream.c +% +fs_dprintk (FS_DEBUG_INIT, "Ha! Initialized OK!\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/atm/firestream.c +% +DPRINTK("strange things happen ...\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/atm/eni.c +% +DPRINTK("doing direct send\n"); /* @@@ well, this doesn't work anyway */ + linux-2.6.6/drivers/atm/eni.c +% +printk(CARDNAME": Bad Craziness - sent packet while busy.\n" ); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/smc9194.c +% +printk(KERN_DEBUG "%s: Done reprogramming Xilinx, %d bits, good luck!\n",...); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/wan/lmc/lmc_main.c +% +printk(KERN_WARNING "Hey who turned the DMA off?\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/wan/z85230.c +% +printk(KERN_DEBUG "%s: Flex. Ttttt...\n", DRV_NAME); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/wan/dscc4.c +% +printk(KERN_DEBUG "%s: BUG... transmitter died. Kicking it.\n",...) + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/acenic.c +% +printk(KERN_ERR "%s: Something Wicked happened! %4.4x.\n",...); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/sundance.c +% +printk ("Kicking board.\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/lp486e.c +% +DPRINTK("Last time you were disconnected, how about now?\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/tokenring/ibmtr.c +% +DPRINTK("FAILURE, CAPUT\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/tokenring/ibmtr.c +% +printk(KERN_WARNING "%s: Thanks, I feel much better now!\n", dev->name); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/de620.c +% +dprintk("kick_rx: maybe kicking\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/ns83820.c +% +Dprintk("oh dear, we are idle\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/ns83820.c +% +printk(KERN_DEBUG "%s: burped during tx load.\n", dev->name) + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/3c501.c +% +printk(KERN_DEBUG "%s: I'm broken.\n", dev->name); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/plip.c +% +printk("%s: TDR is ga-ga (status %04x)\n", ...); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/eexpress.c +% +printk("3c505 is sulking\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/3c505.c +% +printk(KERN_ERR "happy meal: Fry guys."); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/sunhme.c +% +printk(KERN_ERR "happy meal: Transceiver and a coke please."); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/sunhme.c +% +printk("Churning and Burning -"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/char/lcd.c +% +printk(KERN_CRIT PFX "Reboot didn't ?????\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/char/watchdog/softdog.c +% +printk (KERN_DEBUG "Somebody wants the port\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/parport/parport_pc.c +% +printk(KERN_WARNING MYNAM ": (time to go bang on somebodies door)\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/message/fusion/mptctl.c +% +printk(KERN_WARNING MYNAM ": (bad VooDoo)\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/message/fusion/mptctl.c +% +printk(KERN_INFO MYNAM ": English readable SCSI-3 strings enabled :-)\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/message/fusion/mptbase.c +% +printk("NULL POINTER IDIOT\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/media/dvb/dvb-core/dvb_filter.c +% +dprintk(5, KERN_DEBUG "Jotti is een held!\n"); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/media/video/zoran_card.c +% +printk ("scsi%d : Oh no Mr. Bill!\n", host->host_no); + linux-2.6.6/drivers/scsi/53c7xx.c +% +printk(KERN_ERR "scsi%d: !!BINGO!! Falcon has no lock in NCR5380_abort\n", ...) + linux-2.6.6/drivers/scsi/atari_NCR5380.c +% +printk(KERN_CRIT "Whee.. Swapped out page in kernel page table\n"); + linux-2.6.6/mm/vmalloc.c +% +printk("ip6t_hook: happy cracking.\n"); + linux-2.6.6/net/ipv6/netfilter/ip6table_filter.c +% +printk("HAL2: Whee?! Open door and go away!\n"); + linux-2.6.6/sound/oss/hal2.c +% +printk("----------- [cut here ] --------- [please bite here ] ---------\n"); + linux-2.6.6/arch/x86_64/kernel/traps. +% +printk (KERN_ALERT "You are screwed! " ...); + linux-2.6.6/arch/i386/kernel/efi.c +% +printk("you lose buddy boy...\n"); + linux-2.6.6/arch/sparc/kernel/traps.c +% +printk ("Barf\n"); + linux-2.6.6/arch/v850/kernel/module.c +% +printk(KERN_EMERG "PCI: Tell willy he's wrong\n"); + linux-2.6.6/arch/parisc/kernel/pci.c +% +printk(KERN_ERR "Danger Will Robinson: failed to re-trigger IRQ%d\n", irq); + linux-2.6.6/arch/arm/common/sa1111.c +% +printk("; crashing the system because you wanted it\n"); + linux-2.6.6/fs/hpfs/super.c +% +printk("??? No FDIV bug? Lucky you...\n"); + linux-2.2.16/include/asm-i386/bugs.h +% +/* These are the most dangerous and useful defines. They do printk() during + * the interrupt processing routine(s), so if you manage to get "flooded" by + * irq's, start thinking about the "Power off/on" button... + */ + linux-2.2.16/drivers/sbus/char/aurora.h +% +panic("floppy: Port bolixed."); + linux-2.2.16/include/asm-sparc/floppy.h +% +panic("sun_82072_fd_inb: How did I get here?"); + linux-2.2.16/include/asm-sparc/floppy.h +% +#define BB_STAT2_TMP_INTR 0x10 /* My Penguins are burning. +Are you able to smell it? */ + linux-2.2.16/include/asm-sparc/obio.h +% +printk(KERN_ERR "msp3400: chip reset failed, penguin on i2c bus?\n"); + linux-2.2.16/drivers/char/msp3400.c +% +panic("esp_handle: current_SC == penguin within interrupt!"); + linux-2.2.16/drivers/scsi/esp.c +% +/* Host controller interrupts must not be running while calling this + * function or the penguins will get angry. */ + linux-2.2.16/drivers/usb/ohci.c +% +/* Identify the flock of penguins. */ + linux-2.2.16/arch/alpha/kernel/setup.c +% +die_if_kernel("Whee... Hello Mr. Penguin", current->tss.kregs); + linux-2.2.16/arch/sparc/kernel/traps.c +% +die_if_kernel("Penguin instruction from Penguin mode??!?!", regs); + linux-2.2.16/arch/sparc/kernel/traps.c +% +die_if_kernel("Kernel gets FloatingPenguinUnit disabled trap", regs); + linux-2.2.16/arch/sparc/kernel/traps.c +% +/* When we have more time, we can teach the penguin to say + * "By your command" or "Activating turbo boost, Michael". + */ + linux-2.2.16/arch/sparc/prom/sun4prom.c +% +printk("Entering UltraSMPenguin Mode...\n"); + linux-2.2.16/arch/sparc64/kernel/smp.c +% +panic("Attempted to kill the idle task!"); + linux-2.2.16/kernel/exit.c +% +panic("kmem_cache_init(): Offsets are wrong - I've been messed with!"); + linux-2.2.16/mm/slab.c +% +panic("Detected a card I can't drive - whoops\n"); + linux-2.2.16/drivers/net/daynaport.c +% +panic("mother..."); + linux-2.2.16/drivers/block/cpqarray.c +% +panic("Foooooooood fight!"); + linux-2.2.16/drivers/scsi/aha1542.c +% +panic("Unable to find empty mailbox for aha1542.\n"); + linux-2.2.16/drivers/scsi/aha1542.c +% +panic("aha1740.c"); /* Goodbye */ + linux-2.2.16/drivers/scsi/aha1740.c +% +panic("esp: what could it be... I wonder..."); + linux-2.2.16/drivers/scsi/esp.c +% +panic ("Splunge!"); + linux-2.2.16/drivers/scsi/psi240i.c +% +panic("huh?\n"); + linux-2.2.16/arch/i386/kernel/smp.c +% +panic("Tell me what a watchpoint trap is, and I'll then +deal with such a beast..."); + linux-2.2.16/arch/arch/sparc/kernel/traps.c +% +panic("Oh boy, that early out of memory?"); + linux-2.2.16/arch/mips/mm/init.c +% +panic("CPU too expensive - making holiday in the ANDES!"); + linux-2.2.16/arch/mips/kernel/traps.c +% +panic("IRQ, you lose..."); + linux-2.2.16/arch/mips/sgi/kernel/indy_int.c +% +panic("Lucy in the sky...."); + linux-2.2.16/arch/sparc64/kernel/starfire.c +% +printk("Illegal format on cdrom. Pester manufacturer.\n"); + linux-2.2.16/fs/isofs/inode.c +% +printk(KERN_WARNING "%s: Short circuit detected on the lobe\n", +dev->name); + linux-2.4.0-test2/drivers/net/tokenring/lanstreamer.c +% +/* + * Hash table gook.. + */ + linux-2.4.0-test2/fs/buffer.c +% +/* After several hours of tedious analysis, the following hash + * function won. Do not mess with it... -DaveM + */ + linux-2.2.16/fs/buffer.c +% +/* + * We used to try various strange things. Let's not. + */ + linux-2.2.16/fs/buffer.c +% +#if 0 + linux-2.2.16/fs/buffer.c +% +/* + * For moronic filesystems that do not allow holes in file. + * We may have to extend the file. + */ + linux-2.4.0-test2/fs/buffer.c +% +printk(KERN_WARNING "Warning: defective CD-ROM (volume sequence +number). Enabling \"cruft\" mount option.\n"); + linux-2.2.16/fs/isofs/inode.c +% +printk(KERN_WARNING "Multi-volume CD somehow got mounted.\n"); + linux-2.2.16/fs/isofs/inode.c +% +/* Fuck me gently with a chainsaw... */ + linux-2.0.38/arch/sparc/kernel/ptrace.c +% +/* Binary compatibility is good American knowhow fuckin' up. */ + linux-2.2.16/arch/sparc/kernel/sunos_ioctl.c +% +/* Am I fucking pedantic or what? */ + linux-2.2.16/drivers/scsi/qlogicpti.h +% +/* vsprintf.c -- Lars Wirzenius & Linus Torvalds. */ + * + * Wirzenius wrote this portably, Torvalds fucked it up :-) + */ + linux-2.2.16/lib/vsprintf.c +% +printk("Penguin %d is stuck in the bottle.\n", i); + linux-2.0.38/arch/sparc/kernel/smp.c +% +prom_printf("Detected PenguinPages, getting out of here.\n"); + linux-2.0.38/arch/sparc/mm/srmmu.c +% +panic("Aarggh: attempting to free lock with active wait queue - shoot Andy"); + linux-2.0.38/fs/locks.c +% +panic("bad_user_access_length executed (not cool, dude)"); + linux-2.0.38/kernel/panic.c +% +/* + * Should be panic but... (Why are BSD people panic obsessed ??) + */ + linux-2.0.38/net/ipv4/ip_fw.c +% +/* Nobody will ever see this message :-) */ +panic("Cannot initialize video hardware\n"); + linux-2.0.38/arch/m68k/atari/atafb.c +% +printk("ufs_read_super: fucking Sun blows me\n"); + linux-2.0.38/fs/ufs/ufs_super.c +% +printk("autofs: Out of inode numbers -- what the heck did you do??\n"); + linux-2.0.38/fs/autofs/root.c +% +HARDFAIL("Not enough magic."); + linux-2.4.0-test2/drivers/block/nbd.c +% +#ifdef STUPIDLY_TRUST_BROKEN_PCMD_ENA_BIT + linux-2.4.0-test2/drivers/ide/cmd640.c +% +if (user_specified) + /* Didn't work, but the user is convinced this is the + * place. */ + linux-2.4.0-test2/drivers/parport/parport_pc.c +% +printk("VFS: Busy inodes after unmount. " + "Self-destruct in 5 seconds. Have a nice day...\n"); + linux-2.3.99-pre8/fs/super.c +% +# Basic IBM dingbats, some of which will never have a purpose clear +# to mankind + linux-2.4.0/drivers/char/cp437.uni +% +# Okay, what on Earth is this one supposed to be used for? + linux-2.4.0/drivers/char/cp437.uni +% +/* Fuck. The f-word is here so you can grep for it :-) */ + linux-2.4.3/include/asm-mips/mmu_context.h +% +/* Thanks to Rob `CmdrTaco' Malda for not influencing this code in any + * way. + */ + linux-2.4.3/net/core/netfilter.c +% +/* James M doesn't say fuck enough. */ + linux-2.4.3/net/core/netfilter.c +% +/* So there I am, in the middle of my `netfilter-is-wonderful' + talk in Sydney, and someone asks `What happens if you try + to enlarge a 64k packet here?'. I think I said something + eloquent like `fuck'. */ + linux-2.4.3/net/ipv4/netfilter/ip_nat_ftp.c +% +panic ("No CPUs found. System halted.\n"); + linux-2.4.3/arch/parisc/kernel/setup.c +% +printk("HPFS: Grrrr... Kernel memory corrupted ... going on, but + it'll crash very soon :-(\n"); + linux-2.4.3/fs/hpfs/super.c +% +printk("; corrupted filesystem mounted read/write - your computer + will explode within 20 seconds ... but you wanted it so!\n"); + linux-2.4.3/fs/hpfs/super.c +% +printk("What? oldfid != cii->c_fid. Call 911.\n"); + linux-2.4.3/fs/coda/cnode.c +% +printk("Cool stuff's happening!\n") + linux-2.4.3/fs/jffs/intrep.c +% +printk("MASQUERADE: No route: Rusty's brain broke!\n"); + linux-2.4.3/net/ipv4/netfilter/ipt_MASQUERADE.c +% +printk("CPU[%d]: Sending penguins to jail...",smp_processor_id()); + linux-2.4.8/arch/sparc64/kernel/smp.c +% +printk("CPU[%d]: Giving pardon to imprisoned penguins\n", smp_processor_id()); + linux-2.4.8/arch/sparc64/kernel/smp.c +% +printk("CPU[%d]: Sending penguins to jail...",smp_processor_id()); + [... 20 lines ...] +printk("CPU[%d]: Giving pardon to imprisoned penguins\n", smp_processor_id()); + linux-2.4.8/arch/sparc64/kernel/smp.c +% +/* Welcome to Sun Microsystems, can I take your order please? */ +/* Would you like fries with that? */ +/* Anything else? */ +/* Fifty-two cents is your change, have a nice day. */ +/* Would you like to try our SMCC Delux? */ +/* We have a special on GNU/Viking hardware bugs today. */ +/* Will that be all? */ +/* Don't forget your vik_1137125_wa. Have a nice day. */ +/* We're consolidating our STB products, it's your lucky day. */ +/* Come back next week when we are "Sun Microelectronics". */ +/* Remember: "Different name, same old buggy as shit hardware." */ + linux-2.6.6/drivers/net/sunhme.c +% +printk (KERN_INFO "NM256: Congratulations. You're not running Eunice.\n"); + linux-2.6.19/sound/oss/nm256_audio.c +% +printk (KERN_ERR "NM256: Fire in the hole! Unknown status 0x%x\n", ...); + linux-2.6.19/sound/oss/nm256_audio.c +% +printk(KERN_DEBUG "adintr: Why?\n"); + linux-2.6.19/sound/oss/ad1848.c +% +snd_printk(KERN_ERR "Unable to scan for card signature in video RAM\n"); + linux-2.6.19/sound/pci/nm256/nm256.c + (Note what source file this is in -- Ed.) +% +printk("Pretending it's a 3/80, but very afraid...\n"); + linux-2.6.19/arch/m68k/sun3x/prom.c +% +printk("IOP: oh my god, they killed the ISM IOP!\n"); + linux-2.6.19/arch/m68k/mac/iop.c +% +fprintf (stderr, "Not ELF nor a.out. Don't blame me.\n"); + linux-2.6.19/arch/sparc64/boot/piggyback.c +% +printk("starfire_translate: Are you kidding me?\n"); + linux-2.6.19/arch/sparc64/kernel/starfire.c +% +raw_printk("Oops: bitten by watchdog\n"); + linux-2.6.19/arch/cris/arch-v32/kernel/time.c +% +printk(KERN_CRIT "How did I get here?\n"); + linux-2.6.19/arch/mips/kernel/syscall.c +% +printk(KERN_EMERG "This is not a software problem!\n"); + linux-2.6.19/arch/x86_64/kernel/mce.c +% +prom_printf("No VAC. Get some bucks and buy a real computer."); + linux-2.6.19/arch/sparc/mm/sun4c.c +% +printk ("scsi%d : danger Will Robinson!\n", ...); + linux-2.6.19/drivers/scsi/53c7xx.c +% +printk("sim710.c irq nasty\n"); + linux-2.6.19/drivers/scsi/sim710.c +% +/* if it speaks printer language, it's + * probably a printer */ + linux-2.6.19/drivers/parport/probe.c +% +printk(KERN_ERR "BIGMAC: Would you like that for here or to go?\n"); + linux-2.6.19/drivers/net/sunbmac.c +% +printk("%s: Boo!\n", dev->name); + linux-2.6.19/drivers/net/depca.c +% +printk(KERN_ERR "happy meal: Eieee, rx config register gets greasy fries.\n"); + linux-2.6.19/drivers/net/sunhme.c +% +printk(KERN_ERR "happy meal: Transceiver BigMac ATTACK!"); + linux-2.6.19/drivers/net/sunhme.c +% +printk(KERN_ERR "happy meal: Receiver BigMac ATTACK!"); + linux-2.6.19/drivers/net/sunhme.c +% +printk(KERN_WARNING "GSCD: DMA kann ich noch nicht!\n"); + linux-2.6.19/drivers/cdrom/gscd.c + (Do we have i18n'ed messages now? -- Ed.) +% +printk(KERN_ERR "i82092aa: Oops, you did something we didn't think of.\n"); + linux-2.6.19/drivers/pcmcia/i82092.c +% +dprintk("NFSD: laundromat service - starting\n"); + linux-2.6.19/fs/nfsd/nfs4state.c +% +printk("ip6t_hook: happy cracking.\n"); + linux-2.6.19/net/ipv6/netfilter/ip6table_filter.c |